Social Contract and Why I'm Injury Prone

Those of you that know me well know that I have gotten into more than my fair share of violent confrontation. People have said that this indicates that I have shitty judgment. But I can honestly say that every time I have gotten into a fight it was instigated by the other party and that I gave them every opportunity to back down with their ego intact. And lots of times talking a guy down or making him laugh about the situation will work. And sometimes you run into some asshole with something to prove who won’t leave you alone until you either walk off like a little bitch or engage in combat.
It is my opinion that fuckwads like this should be challenged rather than left to run amuck. Maybe if it becomes enough of a hassle to act intolerably and intimidate people for no reason, they’ll stop doing it. It’s true that this attitude landed me in the hospital once and cost me a semester of school, but in hindsight it was still worth it, and usually these things work out in my favor. If someone is behaving intolerably it is your duty to stop them on behalf of everyone around them. I think of this as a sort of social contract.
In any group of people there are certain things that are met with scorn and/or disgust. People tend not to do them because either they have a level of respect for their fellow man, or they are afraid of being reprimanded by their fellow man. Most people I know would not consider trying to steal a purse from an old lady. Imagine you were her, getting shit stolen from you by a big scary guy would suck. So you don’t do it because you can empathize with the old lady. But what if your parents beat you with an electric cord and you never really developed empathy? Then the only thing to stop you would be the fear of punishment. If you saw someone stealing from an old lady I’ll bet you would at least think about kicking the guy’s ass and stomping on his face.
Since so many people think this way in Texas it would be rare to see someone steal a purse from an old lady, beat up someone in a wheelchair, or generally intimidate the weak. The kind of people that would be comfortable with doing this, know that they would be beaten to within an inch of their life after trying.

This is social contract in action. Unwritten laws enforced by the able-bodied among us. I am told by a lady friend of mine from China that things are much different there. In China it is common for people to get robbed in broad daylight, and nobody cares enough to stop it from happening. Could there be a connection?
Anytime someone decides to rob somebodies grandma they are met with no opposition! Everyone sees it! So all the assholes that like the idea of intimidating people are encouraged in that moment, and the offending activity proliferates until someone gets their ass kicked. So violence DOES solve some things and you should feel obligated to kick some ass next time someone tries to shit on someone else’s or your own parade. When I go on rants like this people often act like I am crazy and that I am way off base with my whole argument. I’ve noticed if I quote famous people, for what ever reason, the idea I’m presenting is much more easily accepted. So here it is, I’m not the first guy to say this shit.

"The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing."
-Edmund Burke

“Nothing emboldens the wicked so greatly as the lack of courage on the part of the good.” - Pope Leo XIII


“The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it.”
-Albert Einstein

“…so small evils went unchecked, tyrants became emboldened, then greater evils were unleashed. At each stage good men and women said “Not now - wait, the evil is not big enough to challenge”. Then, before their eyes, the evil became too big to challenge.”
-Jack Straw, British Foreign Secretary

“He who does not punish evil, commands it to be done.”
-Leonardo Da Vinci

“Be as beneficent as the sun or the sea, but if your rights as a rational being are trenched on, die on the first inch of your territory.”
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Yes, I know that these are mostly referring to massive conflicts involving governments, but I would say they apply equally to the microcosm and macrocosm. So there.

Big Truck = Small Dick

Anyone that comes to Texas from some other part of the country or the world will notice a prolific amount of trucks. I suppose its part of the culture. Lots of these guys consider themselves cowboys. I laugh at them. If you probe these stupid hicks you’ll find that most of them have never set foot on a ranch or even come in contact with livestock in a non-romantic fashion. There is a genuine use for trucks. Any time I move to a new residence I try to find a friend with a truck to help me out. So I guess I can’t really complain when a perfectly normal person owns a reasonably sized truck, especially if they use it for its intended purpose very often. This brings me to the behemoths that serve no practical purpose beyond being a psuedophallice. You have probably seen them around. Like this jerks truck.
They have lifted suspensions that give them a height advantage on a two story building and they have gigantic metal protrusions on the front end to deflect cattle, pedestrians, and other vehicles. If you see one of these monstrosities and it’s clean, you can bet the driver has a very small dick. When the driver realized his dick was so small he was very disappointed because this was in contrast to his desire to be an obnoxious, destructive, and arrogant bastard. Guys with tiny dicks really can’t pull this off. Girls won’t put up with an obnoxious guy unless he is either rich or genitally blessed. This lack of female companionship destroys his ego so he can no longer be arrogant. As for destructive, well, you can’t do much damage with a little pecker like that, can you. So our driver sees a two story tall truck and thinks, “This thing is obnoxious, destructive, arrogant, and most importantly BIG!” So he buys the truck to fill the void in his soul that his cock just couldn’t fill. This undoubtedly makes the driver a total douche bag. “But why should you care!” you may be thinking. I care because that gas guzzling piece of shit is increasing the demand for oil. And we all know increased demand causes increased prices. So every time I fill up my reasonably sized sedan I am paying more because some fucking jerk is insecure about his pitiful tool. Now don’t misunderstand, guys with small dongs are not my target. Hell, if they're small it just means their ex-girlfriend will be that much more impressed with me. My real problem is with giant trucks that drive up gas prices and take up road space. I am just saying they wouldn’t be so popular if it weren’t for little wieners.

Dog food?

Any college student in Lubbock will have a Pavlovian reaction if I say “the strip” Immediately their heart rate will rise, breathing becomes heavy, salivation ensues, and the body prepares to experience a hedonists Valhalla. This is because “the strip” is where all Lubbockites must go in order to get one of the few things that can provide momentary relief from how much this town sucks; alcohol. Lubbock is a dry city and no alcohol can be found in convenience or grocery stores. Only bars can sell alcohol legally within the city limits. This law exists to reduce the amount of drunk drivers on the road. So if you want to get fucked up in Lubbock you had better drive your ass up to a bar, get drunk there, and drive home using a the curb as your guide i.e.(bumper bowling), because you can’t buy the booze and take it home. Anyway a friend and I paid homage to the strip one fine Friday afternoon and after acquiring some beer we headed back. One of the more endearing aspects of the strip has got to be the beggars that hangout at the overpass and stand at the stoplight expecting a handout. I saw one of these smelly bastards standing next to a hideously unclean dog. His sign said “Need food for me and my dog” Good thinking! Maybe someone will have pity on that dirty bag of shit you call a dog and they will toss a few bucks your way. I couldn’t help but think of a solution to this mans dilemma. I thought, “Eat your dog, then neither one of you will be hungry!” Then I immediately remembered that food was not the issue and that all those bums beg so close to booze stores so there’s less commute when they finally do get some sucker to hand them money. But I can’t really blame them. If my life sucked as much as theirs I would stay drunk all the time too.